A date in the life...

A date in the life...

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Times a wastin...



After several of workouts, 40 hours at work, a much needed mani/pedi and another failed relationship, I figured it was time to pour myself a large glass of Merlot and share yet another dating debacle.  My toes are a lovely shade of pale pink while my fingernails are a bright fluorescent nod to the 80's.  My hair is fabulously large and makeup flawless, I am wearing turquoise pajama shorts, black tank top and furry zebra print robe and ready to share my sorrows.  I mean, what else would I do looking this way?  While others choose to wear this particular attire to shop at the local Walmart, I choose to sit home with my laptop and glass(bottle) of wine to divulge my pathetic attempts at happily ever after.  You're welcome, you can thank me later!

Remember the good old days when you would be suffering from a breakup and your friends would be there for you with comforting words of wisdom, a meal out, cocktails at the local bar or a shopping trip to support your anguish?  Looks like those days are long gone for me.  Now when I inform my friends that I found myself single again, they respond by saying that it is an opportunity for another blog.  You've got to be kidding me!  No cocktails, no high priced shopping, no 4000 calorie meal followed by a bucket of ice cream.  No!  Sympathetic words of wisdom have been replaced by "please write down your misery and entertain us!"  Ok fine, I can play along.  Here you go my caring friends, enjoy and you can't say that I've never given you anything.

Go ahead and grab a glass of your favorite grape and let's dive in....

On a Friday night while others were out enjoying the Vegas night life, I was at home surfing the Internet for a possible date.  Page after page, I scrolled through countless single men who claim that they are looking for "the one".  On this particular site, you have the option to state whether you are looking for a long term relationship, marriage, dating or just a casual encounter(aka wham bam hand me a tissue ma'am).  I kept it to the ones looking for a relationship because in all honesty, if I was looking for just sex, I could just pick up the phone and get it.  That is not me tooting my own horn, no no, that is just the truth.  Even if I didn't have a little black book, I could go down to the bar and pick a guy up and get it on the parking lot.  I am a fan of the booty call, I really am, but these days I would like to find the sex with a side of relationship.  Call me crazy!  So I had stumbled across a few decent looking and semi normal sounding prospects but none of them were jumping off the page and then I found Brady.  His profile said that he was a single part time father, business owner, local high school coach, 6'4" tall, tattooed and liked dogs.  His one photo was just from the shoulders up and from what I could tell, he was broad with a shaved head and goatee.  Ding Ding Ding!  I sent him a message that was short and sweet that read "Hello.  My name is Christy and I enjoyed your profile.  If you'd like to chat after seeing mine, that would be great."  The way I see it, why go on and on if he takes one look at me and isn't interested?  Within two minutes he had responded with his name.  We went back and forth through messages then moved on to exchanging phone number and texts.  Before long, he asked to meet me the next night for dinner.  I agreed and the next day we met up at a casual restaurant.  I didn't feel the need to get all dolled up this time.  The hair and makeup were good but I was wearing the most casual clothes.  It was just a step up from what I have on now.  Once we got out of our cars and saw each other, the clouds parted and the angels starting singing.  That spark that I've always read about actually happened to me.  We hugged and just clicked right from the start.

After 4 hours of non stop conversation and barely touching our food, we left the restaurant.  He asked if he could hug me goodbye and while hugging I asked if I could kiss him goodbye.  I know, the little slut in me wanted to test the merchandise.  Let's just say he passed with flying colors.  Brady asked if he could see me again the next day and of course I said yes.  He was so good looking in person and beyond charming.  He had told me I was beautiful and couldn't understand why I was single.  The next day we met for a movie then dinner.  During dinner we shared stories and found that we had a lot in common.  A few glasses of wine into the meal, I was an open book.  Normally that could frighten a  man away but in this case, he seemed to really like what I had to say.  Once the night came to an end, we said goodbye at my car and then kissed for several minutes.  I could not get enough of his mouth!  My inner slut was becoming a bonafide whore and was trying to convince me to go home with him.  I won the fight and reluctantly got into my car and went home.  That week we saw each other nearly every day.  He would text and/or call me throughout the day saying the nicest things like he was already hooked or he really liked me.

Refilling...

After 6 weeks of bliss, what went wrong?  That is a great question and I don't really have a solid answer only the facts.  After our (excuse the expression) beating around the bush phase ended and we consummated our relationship, things were amazing.  Not only did we laugh, have fun, talk and do nice things for each other but we were also having fantastic sex.  My only complaint would be that he always preferred me to be on top.  It felt great, don't get me wrong but now and then I prefer to enjoy more and work less.  Just sayin...
I would like to say that we got into a big fight, caught me faking an orgasm or even worse, I caught him with another woman but no.  None of the above.  It just went from being head over heels everyday to he was busier at work and busier with his kids every night.   Our nights filled with dinner then great sex for dessert turned into cancelled plans with apology phone calls.  Text messages replaced phone calls then silence replaced the texts.  The constant disappointment turned me into a full blown bitch.  Sweet and polite me ran into the phone booth, spun around and came out psycho woman. I became a cliche.  In no way was I concerned that he had met someone else.  I was just frustrated and confused as to why we went from happy and seeing each other to a few texts throughout the day and cancelled plans.  I felt blown off without much of an explanation other than his work was getting busier, he was coaching at school daily and had sports with his boys at night.  Okay fine, that makes sense but what didn't quite work for me was on his no kids, no coaching, no work weekends, he still didn't have time for us.  I finally asked him if he just wanted to end things and part ways since he was "so busy".  He told me that he was sorry and didn't want it to be over and would work on fitting me into his life.  I was happy to hear this and believed it would change.  Wrong again Christy!  One week later and nothing had changed other than my frustration meter which went up several degrees.  Then another week went by and we had a long talk on the phone where I said that it's clear he is too busy for this relationship and in turn he convinced me that things were going to get back to normal and the last thing he wants is us to split then concluded by apologies and promises.  You guessed it, one week later and still nothing changed!

Gulp!

After a few weeks of not seeing each other passed, he promised to spend Saturday with me.  Yay, finally!  Saturday morning rolled around and he called saying he had to go on a job and was sorry but he would make it up to me on Sunday.  Against my better judgement, I agreed to it and then didn't hear from him until late that night when he text to say goodnight.  On Sunday morning, I woke up like a kid on Christmas.  I was really excited to see him and vowed not to give him any crap about his recent absence in my life.  I was just going to enjoy our time together.  Well friends, that day of enjoyment did not happen.  Brady called and was engaging in small talk then shared that he couldn't sleep the night before because he was torn about "us".  He went on to say that he doesn't have time in his life for me anymore and that I deserve someone who makes me a priority and has time to care about me.  Ouch!  I stayed silent as he proceeded to tell me that he would've called it quits sooner but struggled with the idea that if he let me go, then someone else would scoop me up and that was an unsettling thought for him.  Poor guy.  He asked me to say something and I told him that there was no point in saying anything, what's done is done.  So all I could say was goodbye.

If you are reading this thinking that there must be something missing from this story and surely two people don't go from bliss to suddenly too busy to breakup in the blink of an eye without a good reason, then that makes two of us.  Is it possible that one's life gets that hectic that they don't have time for the other?  Was there another woman?  Did he simply just lose interest?  I have no idea.  All I know is that I may never know.

Like Queen once said, another one bites the dust.  Instead of a night out with girlfriends, cocktails and rich food I have chosen to indulge my dear friends with another bite of my pathetic life.  Feel free to thank me as I finish off my bottle, er uh I mean glass of wine.

You are welcome!